+ . . [ [ :: the angel in disguise

Monday, April 24, 2006

i always tell myself. it's time to grow up le. always... i reminded myself. but i dun seems to be reflecting on the issue of growing up.

working life is so different from school. so different from normal life. the office politics. those 'xiao ren'. though in school, we also tend to meet with those 'xiao ren', but the situation aint so serious as compared to work.

maybe due to im young compared to the others. maybe due to im too childish. maybe due to my family background. maybe due to my character. maybe due to my behaviour. i expected too much from others le.

at home, everyone gives in to me. my relatives give in to me. my close frenz give in to me. even sometimes in school, my frenz also give in to me. there's alway ppl giving in to me and i took it for granted and expect 'everyone' to give in to me. logically, i noe it's not right. but inside me.. i just 'expect' them to do so.

i wun throw my temper nor be unreasonable to show out my unhappiness with them. but i will just dun feel good by keep quiet and stay away from them. knowing it's not right, but the habit is just there. just like what jian bao said, im too 'princess' le. i need to learn to grow up. learn to adpat with the society. learn to be an adult.

maybe it's my childishness, made him gave up on me. maybe it's my behaviour. maybe it's my character. i noe.. it's all my fault ba. i used to blame him so much. blame him for making me to fall for him and after that left me all alone. blame him for causing me to be so miserable. blame him for making me cry. but i never once thought of the time he spent for the past 7 years 'waiting' for me and 'bother' to find out anything about my recent life. be it, will he be reading this. just wish to say a very big sorry to you. and really really... wish you all the best for your future. your gf will be the xing fu person in the world. =)

i always said.. it will be my last time blogging about him. haha.. but i duno this is the how many 'last time' le. well... missing someone cannot be controlled. tears that are shed for someone also cannot be controlled. so be it.. why must hide it? miss den miss lor.. cry den cry lor.. even if i say i miss him.. he also wun bother.

really wish all the best for all my beloved friends. i miss you all so so so so much. thanks those who i always take granted for. thanks those who gave in to me so much. thanks those who teng me so much. =)

ANGEL_scribbled * -9:31 PM

now that he's gone

~~girl~~ you know i miss you so
i didn't know you had to go
you've had enough of our distance baby
before i had the chance to say
i'm staying with you
for the rest of my life

don't keep telling me these words
you don't know how much it hurts
and i'll promise you eternity
if you promise me your stay
but now it's too late
i'm no longer the ~~man~~ girl that i was

i will go on without ~~her~~ him
like a fool who's too sure
i'm like a brid who's lost her wing
a fire without its flame

i don't know how to be strong
when my love has to move on
i am a song without a soul
now that ~~she's~~ he's gone
what's left of us is this song

[what's left was just those memories]

ANGEL_scribbled * -9:28 PM

Saturday, April 15, 2006

going for medical check up tml at 9am and im still superly awake now.

just came back frm double O. last min decided to go due to my friend's nagging. -_-

not really very happening. music dun suit me. nv drink enough. nv dance enough. basically.. never get to enjoy really that much. pathetic. due to certain reason, im in a pissed and moody mode, therefore HOW TO ENJOY?

by the way, i wana learn cantonese. anyone can teach?

im converted to full timer le. but it's still 8 hours per day. so my dearest frenz.. pls start to have some gathering!!

quite broke now.. anyone.. wana yang me? haha.

forgot to mention.. meet up with my cousins last sun at chua chu kang. haha. fun sia. everyone gossip here and there. and i miss my outing with my cousins so much. everyone is so damn busy.

trying to get some slp soon. waiting for my hair to dry.

beside that. i miss *you.

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:30 AM

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

i miss everyone!
i miss school!
i miss fyp!
i miss the lab!
i miss the class!
i miss!
i miss..
my dearest RP~!

happy birthday mummy!

ANGEL_scribbled * -12:02 AM

Monday, April 03, 2006

TP soon.

awaiting for my TP date. damn it.. i need to drag for so long.. damn idiot! hmpf!!

off today. relax time. weehee! =)

but i still got to work tml. pathetic.

had a talk with fox yest. hmmm.. interesting. mentioned about the past again and that dreadful month i had previously. well.. learning to 'kan kai yi dian'. maybe im just taking it too hard le bah. =)

yest' talk make me miss mick so much. haha. shall msg her soon. my dearest pts. haha. i wonder how is her knee le.. hmMmm..

jess starts to work le lor.. on her way to become a successful lady too. zhen and gal lei? and and.. lao da.. dun slack le.. we all faster earn more and be successful ladies worz..

my frenz just got a big present for his gf. it's a mini copper!!!!! bloodly idiot. i also want!!! arGh!! haha. i think he will be very very broke while paying installment for the mini copper. or-bi. act rich la.. hmpf.

oh ya.. no reply from him. hmmm.. maybe he dun wana meet up with me.. maybe he din read my blog anymore. should i just sms him den? hmMmmm... i shall consider den.

ANGEL_scribbled * -4:15 PM

Saturday, April 01, 2006

working now.

im working now. in the office. feeling so pathetic now coz im superly hungry. dun have the time to buy my dinner and i haven take my breakfast and lunch. -_-

feeling a little tired after playing so much with the gang in the office. haha. it's fun you know? in the middle of the night, when there's not much phone call, the gang here playing 5, 10. loser will have to be hit by the pillow. haha. lame right? but... fun la. haha.

blogging.. waiting for phone calls and watching movie on my lappy now. POWER right? haha.. im superly power! opps. =x

i feel like eating jap food sia.. just now someone told me that he's going to jap restaurant for dinner.. so damn envy sia.. but nvm.. he promise to bring me go next time. heex. beside that.. im going to receive something from him because im guai. haha. =)

looking forward to the training that's going to start on wednesday. =)

im so tired now ya.. finishing work at 4am.. hopefully 4am faster come. haha. =x very tired lei... *yawnz.

ANGEL_scribbled * -2:39 AM